———————————————————————————————-
I will start a diary here. It is so dear and confidential to me that you can read it!!? (If you are old enough to read, that is.)
—————
SOO…. I abandoned an infant on the internet
Let me explain dudes. So I made this google account and made the person be born yesterday. We called the account something like infant, squirt, etc. (I DONT EVEN REMEMBER THE NAME! FOR SHAME!). So anyways, I forgot my password to the account and accidentally logged out. This poor infant that I can’t remember the name of is growing older and is probably a toddler right now.
Holy feck there is an ice cream truck outside. I think the 👶 name began with an F…
F U ICE CREAM TRUCK BRING MY MF ICE CREAM HE’S LOST AND DANGEROUS NOW JUST LIKE ME.
—————
Performing CPR on Myself (safe for all ages)
I’m not that much of a narcissist, okay? I was dying on the floor recently, turning blue, all that shizz and people said “WE WONT DO CPR ON YOU” and I’m gasping for breath and my heart is stopping and stuff so I can’t say wtf. One guy is big and muscular and the other is a biatch woman. So on the cold floor I pumped my chest and lived.
I’m no autosexual. I’m not attracted to myself. I was attracted to living. Some biatches denied I performed cpr and I’m like “DUDE IM STILL ALIVE AND YOU KNOW HOW PEOPLE ARE AROUND HERE STFU.”
The funniest part is that I actually created a song about CPR before I knew CPR with my friend! HERE it is… it was playing in my head the whole time! It actually went to the beat of CPR wth!?!
—————
MY GUARDIAN ANGEL MADE MY HIGH SCHOOL BULLIES PAY
So I’m a Buddhist, right? Spirituality is part of my religion and I have been diagnosed as a non-schizo by many doctors. I’m just quirky like that, is my diagnosis.
Anywho, so the spirit of Florian Schneider-Esleben from Kraftwerk achieved samsara and communicates messages to me. Cool, right? Gotta stop now or he’ll give me an aneurysm!
TO END THIS BEFORE IM ENDED, HE DECAPITATED THESE BULLIES WHO TRIED TO DECAPITATE ME IN A DREAM WHILE HE…HE HAD A HALO AND ANGEL WINGS. IT WAS A SILLHOUETTE BUT IT WAS HIM ALRIGHT. I THINK HES THAT SEAGULL SCP NOW I LINKED IN ABOUT.
GOTTA LOVE THE SUPREME PERSONALITY OF THE GODHEAD, KRISHNA, AND LORD VISHNU AND SHIVA BRO.
NOT FORGETTING BRAHMA. HIS NAME LITERALLY MEANS LIFE.
DO NOT F WITH HIM ER IST EIN MADMENSCH ALSO!!1!!11!1!1!!€€€€ DONT SAY ANYTHING MEAN HE IS A WICKED SICK POLTERGEIST YOU MENSCHMASCHINES!!!!!
THIS IS ONE OF OUR MANY THEME SONGS
ANOTHER (we don’t get into the fact he was a part Jew… only he can joke about that and I have many Jewish friends and look Jewish and hate N*zis alright please believe me I’m sincere and caring okay this man lives in my walls as a spirit I can’t control his sense of humor F off and leave me aloone)
—————
CEREBROSPINAL FLUID LEAKS AND ME
Basically, brain juices come out of my noise when I’m overwhelmed.
Not snot. Brain matter.
